Over the past few years, I’ve learned a great deal about my past life in Europe that ended during World War II. My spirit guides have given me the information slowly, piece by piece, during many different meditation and bodywork sessions. I have an enormous amount of information on that life, perhaps because it was so recent and so powerful, but more likely because I have had so much healing work to do around it. What has become very obvious to me over the years as I worked through the issues that have come up is that most of my current life could be described as PTSD from my last life. So many of the decisions I’ve made or the fears I’ve had are direct results of what happened then.
The basics of what I know is that I was born around 1920 as a woman to lower class parents who lived somewhere in rural England; I’m not sure where exactly. I had a sister who was beloved to me and a grandmother whom I was very close to, but I don’t know much about other family members aside from some basics about my parents. When I was a young teenager, I left school against my wishes to go into service at the home of a local minor nobility. This man was an alcoholic and a generally miserable controlling person. He had a daughter whom he’d sired at 20 with the family’s secretary; the daughter was five years older than me. As he aged, he was getting much more desperate for a male heir. Thus, when he forced me to have sex with him and I got pregnant, he actually married me despite the 25 year age difference and my lower class origins. Much to his dismay, I miscarried midway through the pregnancy, possibly due to the chlamydia that he had given me. Despite his best efforts, I did not become pregnant again, and I assumed I was sterile.
From there, my life became crazier than what one would normally expect for a wife of that class and era. I began having sex with a neighbor; my husband was not pleased about the affair but turned a blind eye because our distaste for each other was so great at that point. I also had an affair with the step-daughter metioned above. When World War II began, I jumped at the chance for adventure and escape from my husband, and I became a British spy who was sent abroad. I slept my way across Europe: I’ve seen at least four men whom I was sexually involved with but I wouldn’t be surprised if there were more. The sexual activity was for both business and pleasure. One of those affairs resulted in a pregnancy which I had illegally terminated.
For a long time I questioned how I could have gone from my simple English origins to being a spy in Germany. It just didn’t make sense to me. However, I eventually was shown that my father was a German Jewish immigrant to England; my mother was a native and an Anglican. I was raised bilingual. There were other German-speaking Jews in our community as well. Thus, I was someone who would have been optimal to serve the British government best in the war: A woman who could pass as a native German without arousing suspicion. I worked my way through France to Germany, though I’m not sure how long I was actually in France. It may have been just one fateful train ride (and romantic hookup). In Germany, I was working at a military factory as part of my spy work, but I was also secretly doing relief work for a Jewish refugee camp for immigrants from Eastern Europe.
Sometime last year, I finally made the connection between my childhood recurring dream in this life and my past life in Germany during World War II. On the day when I finally understood what the dream was about, I had a complete and total emotional meltdown. I called my therapist for an emergency phone session; in her words, I was confronting true evil in its darkest sense. As I talked to her on the phone while pacing the back porch, green dragonflies were literally circling around me, an unusual occurrence in my yard. Symbolically, dragonflies are “connected to the symbolism of change and light.” Their green color related to my heart chakra, indicating the change in my energy relating to love and compassion. In retrospect, the symbolism couldn’t have been any more powerful.
Most of us were taught the horror stories of what happened to Jews and others in the concentration camps in Germany, but the worst of it didn’t make it into the history books. The things I saw during the war and then in my recurring dreams in this life were so horrific that I don’t discuss them with most people (including here on the blog) because they would be traumatizing for most highly sensitive people, empaths or those who had family members who were lost or killed during those terrible years. However, once I had calmed down many weeks later, I consulted one of of the professors who had been on my dissertation committee and who has published a book on the concentration camps. He confirmed for me that what I had seen was highly suspected and had been hinted at in cultural artifacts. It’s just not something that has ever been widely published.
My soul was deeply traumatized by what I witnessed and participated in during World War II. There are no words to express it all. This created the spiritual root for the Lyme disease and many other traumas I endured during my current life. I truly believed at the soul level that I deserved to suffer terribly for my part in the war even though I was acting as a spy when I took the actions I did. When I first began having major health problems in 2003 and 2004, I used to tell people, “I must have been a Nazi in a past life to deserve this kind of suffering.” My subconscious knew what was going on at a soul level.
The past few months have involved a great deal of work reprogramming my body to undo the damage from World War II that I brought into this life. The stored emotions, entities, and pain had to be released so that I can heal completely. That release has involved a great deal of physical and emotional pain as I addressed the issues, let them surface, and then removed them from my body, often with the help of the various healers on my team.
Last Monday, we hit an apex of healing. In what seems absolutely unimaginable and unrealistic, my body manifest an actual lump in my abdomen in the area of my liver that was a result of one of the bullets that killed me somewhere around 1941. While the bullet from the past life was not literally there, the lump was real. Two different healers were able to palpate it and sense the pain from it. Using several crystals and flower essences as well as energy work, we were able to dissolve that large lump. The whole situation was amazing to experience, yet I am so grateful to have that energetic bullet gone. My healing is not yet over; we continue to clean out whatever comes up. I am not sure how much more there is to go, but removing that bullet was key to my healing.
I have been given the names of my husband and me in that life, and someday I hope to be able to go to Britain and do research to find more information though I suspect a great deal of it is still classified. I also may go back to Germany someday to the city where I was stationed and attempt to find complete peace with what happened there. My body was never returned to England, but I suspect it was put in an unmarked grave. I also doubt there are any remnants of the other activities I was involved in during my past life, but I still would like to see and experience the area again, this time under the banner of compassion, healing and peace.
© 2015 Elizabeth Galen, Ph.D., Green Heart Guidance, LLC