In 2003, my health collapsed. I was exhausted beyond belief, and I was having problems with synthetic chemicals such as perfume. However, based on the fact that I had three children under the age of three, my well-meaning but erroneous family practice doctor decided that I was suffering from depression. To get him to stop talking to me, I took the prescription for an anti-depressant and promptly tore it up as I left the office.
Eventually I was given a legal diagnosis for chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) and fibromyalgia (FM). My health continued spiraling downward. I was clearly suffering from multiple chemical sensitivities (MCS) as well. By 2005, I was in bed for 22+ hours a day, hardly able to function. I would leave the house for only a few hours every month to go see my new doctor, and despite the fact he keeps a green office, I would be sick for days after going. My then husband had to drive me to the appointments because I wasn’t strong enough to drive myself.
I spent years in recovery. I quickly exhausted my doctor’s bag of tricks even though he works with the CFS/FM/MCS population. It then became a matter of me doing on the internet looking for new treatment options to try. My Ph.D. served a new purpose as I spent my free time and very minimal energy researching health issues and reading medical studies.
Over the years I would be asked frequently by very well-meaning folks, “Have you tried…?” The answer almost always was yes. Usually it was something I tried to no avail early in my illness. Other times people would insist I try some experimental procedure that I had already researched and decided was inappropriate for me. They insisted that I couldn’t say it wouldn’t help me if I didn’t try. However, I had learned over the years of illness to hone my intuition. I have a 95% success rate for myself when it comes to predicting the outcomes of supplements and treatments. When I ignored that intuition, I often ended up spending money on a useless treatment, or worse yet, harming myself from something I knew would not be good for me. I learned how to listen to my body and know what it needs. Listening to one’s body and one’s intuition is a very difficult concept for many people to understand.
Eventually in 2009, I decided to be tested for Lyme Disease using IgeneX testing, and not surprisingly, it was positive. I had been bit in 1994 on a trip to Missouri, and at that time, I had suffered from extreme fatigue and flu like symptoms. I had a rash, but it wasn’t a bull’s eye rash, so my doctor was skeptical it was Lyme. The test she ran (which I now know has a 50% false negative rate) was negative. Had I been treated with four weeks of antibiotics then, my life might have been very different. However, that isn’t what happened. Lyme is a very political disease, and the CDC does not believe that late disseminated Lyme Disease exists. Based on my personal experience, I disagree violently. I have many other strong opinions about Lyme and other tick related diseases as well (since I tested positive for Ehrlichia and we suspect I had/have Bartonella as well).
A few months later, I threw my back out while walking in a local park. I had used chiropractic care before, but the office I had previously utilized had begun spraying down the rooms with a toxic cleaner that I cannot tolerate. They refused to stop. I was referred to another chiropractic office in town where I found my future waiting. The chiropractors in this office worked different than any of the previous ones I had seen. About six months into my time there, my primary chiropractor asked if he could take over directing my healthcare treatment. Since none of my other doctors were really directing me in any way, I agreed, feeling an amazing relief that someone I truly trusted was interested in helping get me better.
From there it was the beginning of another long road, but at least I was finally seeing significant albeit very slow progress. My healing took another turn in October 2011 when a therapist told me, “You’re an intuitive empath.” My response was, “I’m a what?” I learned that I feel other people’s emotions in my own body (much like Counselor Deanna Troi on Star Trek: The Next Generation), and I am very sensitive to messages from higher powers outside of humanity. Over the next few months, my therapist and a new chiropractor in the same office helped me start to rebuild my grounding and shielding mechanisms. I soon switched therapists to work with a woman who had even more ability to help me work with these skills and to become an emotionally healthier intuitive who could safely help herself and others.
In February 2013, I decided one day to listen to my body during my massage. I was expecting to hear where pain was that I had been repressing. Instead, I experienced a true shock. I connected with my spirit guide. As I received that first healing message, I was in awe at what I was seeing and hearing. Since then, I discovered that I can use all five of my primary senses to connect with the other side of the astral plane. What’s more, it’s not just me whom I can receive healing messages for: It’s anyone. With their permission, I can connect to others’ guides to receive messages for them to accelerate and accentuate their paths of healing.
By tapping into those healing messages, astronomical leaps forward in my healing have happened. I am able to regularly socialize in public, something I had not done in nine years. I can occasionally eat conventional food in restaurants without getting sick. I have many food sensitivities, but I can eat around them. I still must nap daily, and I still cannot be around perfume, cologne, other heavily fragrant body products, or scented candles. I can only function in public for a few hours at a time. However, after being bedbound at one point, I feel like I have won the lottery. Each day that passes brings more healing.
As I began contemplating this new business, I felt it might be hypocritical that someone who is still working so hard on her own health issues could be helping others. I am clearly not even 50% well yet. However, I thought about it quite a bit. Most of my health practitioners struggle with their own health issues and personal demons. As a result of my pondering, I realized that no one is ever 100% healed. We all continue working on our personal battles across our lifetimes. The major difference is that unlike others who aren’t aware of their shortcomings, I am consciously working on improving myself, and I plan to keep walking down that road until I die.
Ultimately, I decided that I have been given too great of a gift not to share it. My ability to use all five of my primary senses to connect with the other side of the astral plane is a blessing that has the potential to help many others on their healing journey. If I don’t share this gift with others, I would be horribly selfish. In addition, I’ve discovered that helping others helps me heal as well. I am so grateful for this opportunity that I have been blessed with, and I look forward to working with many others striving for physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health in the future.
© 2013 Green Heart Guidance